Here are 21 of my favorite activities to build confidence.
I have personally used all of these over the years (except #19, but I’ll be doing it soon).
These activities have helped me so much and I hope they help you too.
21 Confidence Building Activities
Quick Personal Note: I believe 10,000% that a healthy self esteem and self confidence comes from seeing yourself like God sees you. He knows you completely and declares that you were fearfully and wonderfully made. ❤️
Ever have moments when you’re feeling insecure and it gets the best of you?
Moments when you get so deep in your insecurity that you spiral into anger, disappointment, depression…
The deeper you get into that sunken place, the harder it is to get out.
It’s lonely. Frustrating. Infuriating.
Can you relate? If so, I just want you to know you’re not alone.
I’ve been there and it’s the worst.
Although they won’t fix things instantly, these confidence building activities can help you through those hard moments.
1. Listen to empowering music
Sometimes you need a quick pick-me-up and that’s where this activity comes in.
The right song can instantly help you snap out of a funk, lift your mood, and remind you that you’re all that and a bag of chips.
And no, I will neva stop making 90s references. 😂
Anyhoo, that’s why I have a personal playlist of songs to help me beat insecurity and feel more confident.
2. Start a Gratitude Journal
I recommend using a gratitude journal together with another activity on this list.
When you’re struggling with low self-esteem or self-worth, chances are your drowning in a sea of negative thoughts daily.
That’s stressful and tiring, to say the least.
Starting a gratitude journal forces you to focus on all the blessings in your life.
As you focus on the big things and the small things, that are good in your life, you’ll find your mood lifting and your perspective shifting.
It’s much easier to practice building confidence when you’re consciously aware of all the things you have going for you.
Plus, journaling is incredibly therapeutic and I 10/10 recommend giving it a try.
If you’ve never journaled before, check out this post on how to start journaling.
3. Use Journal Prompts to Get Started
Our minds are on auto-pilot for the most part.
And when negative thoughts are constantly flying around your mind, you’ll find it hard to switch to more positive thinking.
That’s where using journal prompts comes in handy.
They’re questions that will help you change your perspective and focus on positive things.
I’ve been journaling since I was a teenager and it is definitely one of my favorite self-esteem activities.
These self-worth journal prompts will get you started.
4. Watch something inspiring
Sometimes you don’t have what it takes to shake yourself out of a funk.
In those moments, watching something inspiring is a great way to build your confidence.
For example, after I gave birth to my daughter, watching Youtube videos from other first-time-mom’s helped a ton.
It was a great way to feel “connected” to someone else struggling with what I was struggling with.
Sometimes, just knowing you’re not alone in the way you feel, helps you feel more confident.
I usually walked away from those videos with a more empowering and confident perspective.
Do a quick YouTube search and see what you can find.
5. Draw inspiration from your role model
Here’s the good news – you’re not the first person to struggle with self-esteem.
And you can learn a lot from people who have overcome doubt, imposter, syndrome, or a poor sense of self-worth.
Find someone who’s been through what you’re going through, and learn from them.
If you can have a conversation with that person, even better.
Getting practical advice from someone who’s been in your shoes, can help you build confidence faster.
6. Pick up a new skill
Exploring new challenges is an excellent way to build confidence.
It creates an opportunity for you to learn and get good at something new.
Think about the last thing you tried that you did surprisingly well at.
Remember how good that felt?
Getting involved in fun, extracurricular activities, especially those you’re good at, is a great way to build your confidence.
7. Take a step out of your comfort zone
You’ll be surprised at how much you can accomplish when you give yourself a chance.
Your braver, smarter, and more amazing than you give yourself credit for.
Stepping out of your comfort zone and doing something that challenges you is the best way to discover “what you’re made of.”
As you give yourself more opportunities to grow, it’ll help with building self-confidence.
What new things can you try this week that will take you out of your comfort zone?
8. Change your body language
Ever look at someone and know exactly how they’re feeling by the way they look?
That’s because we naturally project how we feel.
When you’re feeling more confident, you carry yourself differently…
You walk with your back straight, you smile more, make more eye contact, you’re more sure of yourself when you talk…
Well, the good news is that using “confident body language” can actually make you feel more confident.
You’ll probably feel like a fraud at first, but keep doing it and it’ll start to feel more natural.
9. Make positive affirmations daily
Negative self-talk is the ultimate self-esteem killer.
One of the most powerful confidence-boosting activities I can recommend is to practice saying good things about yourself.
Stand in front of the mirror and make positive affirmations on a daily basis.
A high self-esteem can be directly connected to how you think about yourself, and how you talk to yourself.
If you need help silencing your inner critic, you can start with these 100 Confidence Boosting Affirmations.
I would make this one of the first confidence-building activities you try.
10. Practice your social skills
If you feel socially awkward and that’s hurting your confidence, then it’s time to practice your social skills.
Like most things, the only way to get better in social situations is to practice.
You can keep it low pressure by practicing at an event you’ll enjoy.
For example, go on meetup.com and find an event that interests you.
You’ll automatically have things in common with the people there.
Plus you’ll get to talk about something you care about.
For extra support, invite one of your friends to go with you.
Start small and challenge yourself to talk to 1 new person.
Even if you feel awkward doing it, you’ll also feel proud of yourself for being brave enough to try.
What’s one way you can practice your social skills this week?
11. List positive things about yourself
If I asked you what you don’t like about yourself, you might have a list a mile long.
Humans have negativity bias, which means we tend to focus more on negative things that we do on positive or neutral things.
It’s easy for us to pick ourselves apart, and often much harder to find positive things about ourselves.
This activity helps you build healthy self-esteem by training your mind to focus on the things you like about yourself.
You can even turn it into a fun game.
Get a sheet of paper and challenge yourself to list everything you like about yourself.
Set your timer for 3 mins.
Challenge yourself to list over 50 things, and if you do, give yourself a prize.
Have fun with it and give yourself permission to celebrate even the small things.
12. Ask someone you trust
Often, it’s easy for the people closest to us to see our best qualities…
And much harder for us to see those qualities in ourselves.
Ask someone who knows you well, and someone you trust for their insight.
Find out what they like about you, what they think your strengths are, and what they admire about you.
You may be surprised at their answer.
Getting someone else’s perspective can positively shift your perspective.
And hearing what they love about you could be just the self esteem boost you need.
13. Set your timer in uncomfortable social situations
If being in certain social situations brings up negative feelings for you, try this the next time you’re out…
Challenge yourself to talk to 1 person for just 120 seconds and then take a break.
If you can last longer than 2 minutes, that’s gravy baby.
But, you want to practice engaging with people without feeling too overwhelmed.
You can use the clock on your phone to keep track of the time.
And when 2 minutes are up, you can keep talking or excuse yourself – whichever you prefer.
Do that a few times, and you’ll find yourself feeling more comfortable, and ultimately more confident.
14. Do something you’re good at
What’s something you’re good at and enjoy?
Something that when you do it, makes you feel like you’re in the zone?
Do more of that thing on a regular basis.
I say this all the time, but your personal progress is one of the biggest motivators you have.
Doing something you’re good at, experiencing that feeling of success in your body, and watching yourself dominate at that activity, can be amazing for your confidence.
15. Change your physical state
The mind-body connection is amazing.
Doing something physical can instantly have a positive impact on your mood.
Go for a run, hit the gym, do some stretching, whatever works for you…
Seriously, research shows that after just 5 minutes of moderate exercise, you can start to experience a shift in your mood.
If you’re feeling insecure, one of the best ways to get out of your head is to move your body.
16. Talk with the right people daily
If you have people who can love on you, encourage, motivate, and uplift you, surround yourself with those people.
Seriously, talk to them as often as you can.
The positive feedback you get from people who genuinely love you can do wonders for your mental health and your self esteem.
For me, talking to my mom, dad, or husband helps because I know they’ll listen to me without judging me.
Who can you spend more time talking with?
17. Act like you do when you’re feeling your best.
This is probably going to be super hard, but it will help.
Ask yourself this question, “if I was feeling my happiest right now, what would I be doing?”
And then do that thing.
For me, I’d take a shower, get dressed up, and put on some makeup.
Even if I wasn’t going anywhere, the process of getting dressed up, made me feel better (especially if I wasn’t feeling insecure about my physical appearance).
Or, I’d start reaching out to my friends/family and having casual conversations with them.
When I was in my “sunken place”, I usually wanted to be left alone.
Isolation fed my insecurity.
To get out of that sunken place, I’d force myself to talk to and be around other people. Before I knew it, i’d feel my mood shifting.
Basically the goal is to do the opposite of what you feel like doing when you’re feeling your worst.
18. Measure your growth
A growth mindset is one of the key characteristics of confident people.
Cultivating a growth mindset is one of the most effective ways to consistently build your self confidence.
Growth is a natural motivator.
Growth means that we’re learning, doing better, accomplishing more, and moving in the direction of our goals.
What’s the area in your life where you can see the most growth over the past year?
Give yourself permission to celebrate how far you’ve come.
What’s one area in your life where you want to grow more over the next year?
Come up with your own personal growth plan.
As you make progress towards your growth goals, you’ll also naturally be building self-esteem.
19. Keep a ‘hype’ file on your phone
A hype file is a collection of notes where you keep track of your victories.
Got an “A” on your exam?… Add it to the hype file.
Crushed your weight loss goal?… Add it to the hype file.
Worked up the courage to introduce yourself to someone new?… Hype file.
Your hype file can be a note on your phone where you keep track of your wins.
When you’re feeling down, your hype file will encourage and inspire you.
As always, I saved the best for last.
I will never tire of saying this…
The best thing you can do if you’re struggling with a lack of confidence, is to start seeing yourself through God’s eyes.
He loves you, He calls you His workmanship, and He created you in His image.
The ultimate confidence booster is to spend time talking with Him and letting Him show you how He sees you.
I can tell you from personal experience, that no other confidence building activity has helped me as much as praying about my insecurity.
Over time I noticed a higher self esteem that was based on who I am in Him.
So today, I challenge you to pray this simple prayer…
“Jesus, help me to see myself through your eyes. Amen.”
Embrace what you can’t change
As great as these activities are, we’ve gotta be real…
Sometimes the things that make us feel insecure are things that are 100% out of our control.
And in those cases learning how to embrace what you can’t change can do wonders for your mental health, peace of mind, and your confidence.
For example, I have an inverted triangle body shape.
And for most of my life, I hated my body.
I wanted to be shaped like Beyonce. 😂
But there’s no amount of gym time or protein shakes that can change the structure of my body from inverted triangle to hourglass.
I had to learn to embrace what I couldn’t change.
And it was very hard because I was so convinced that to be beautiful I needed to look a certain way.
But over the years God has helped me to let go of my old standard of beauty so that I could see and appreciate the beautiful things He’s blessed me with.
If you need help embracing what you can’t change, pray the Serenity prayer.
“God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.”
What’s hurting your self esteem?
An attack on your self-esteem and self-worth is really an attack on your purpose.
If you don’t deal with insecurity, you’ll deal with its consequences
(ex. Poor self image causes you to settle for less than you deserve. Your insecurities will convince you to hide when you should be showing up in this world fully and authentically. You’ll miss out on being the absolute best version of yourself. etc.)
And we cannot have that.
Your life and future are worth more than that.
You are worth more than that.
So let me ask you…
What do you believe about yourself that leaves you lacking confidence?
Maybe it’s something about your body, your intellect, or your personality that leaves you feeling like you’re not enough.
Whatever it is, think about that thing. We’re gonna face it now.
But to do this, you’re going to have to challenge yourself.
Facing your Fears
Let’s keep it funky…
Building your confidence likely means you’ll have to face your fear.
You’ll have to do some hard things…
Things that will make you feel uncomfortable.
Things that may even make you angry or upset.
And as tempting as it is to avoid discomfort, don’t.
The discomfort is a natural side-effect of growth.
And if you allow yourself to experience the discomfort long enough, you’ll find yourself growing, learning, and become more confident.
If you’re serious about exploring different ways to feel more confident in your everyday life, then you’ve gotta check out this Face the Fear Challenge.
It’s a 30 Day Challenge designed to help you ditch fear, so you can live with more courage and confidence.
w/ light and love,
Matthew 5:14 – You are the light of the world. And like a city on a hill that cannot be hidden.