How do you speak about yourself? Better yet, how do you speak to yourself?
If you’re struggling with insecurity and low self-esteem then I already know the answers to those questions.
You’re mean. Am I right?
Your own self-talk probably resembles that of a bully’s.
You’re constantly pointing out your flaws, comparing yourself to others, and talking down to yourself.
If this sounds like you, keep reading sis. I’ve got something for ya.
Welcome to Day 4 of the Overcoming Insecurity Challenge:
Self Esteem Affirmations
This whole challenge has been about Overcoming Insecurity and so far we’ve talked about:
👉A spiritual game plan (your relationship with God will be amazingly helpful in overcoming low self esteem)
👉A practical game plan (5 actions you can take today to beat insecurity and low self esteem)
👉And today we’re talking about changing your speech.
Remember when you were in grade school and you learned this
👉 “sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”
Lemme tell you something sis, they lied.
The science backs it up – negative words can literally affect your brain, your hormones, and ultimately your actions.
So fixing your self-talk is going to be super important for you. That’s what we’re dealing with today.
We’re going through 6 types of self esteem affirmations that will uplift, empower, and encourage you to be the very best version of yourself.
But, first feel free to catch up if you need to…
Here are the first 3 days of the challenge and you can do them here:
- Day 1 of the challenge – “This is why you have low self esteem”
- Day 2 of the challenge – “How to trust God when you have low self esteem”
- Day 3 of the challenge – “Feeling insecure or self-conscious? Do these 5 things”
If we understood the power of our thoughts, we would guard them more closely. If we understood the awesome power of our words, we would prefer silence to almost anything negative. In our thoughts and words, we create our own weaknesses and our own strengths. Our limitations and joys begin in our hearts. We can always replace negative with positive. Betty Eadie
Now let’s jump into it.
Affirmations about your behavior
Why: One way to change your self esteem is to change your behavior. Your life is, in a lot ways, a result of the things you have and have not done. And We’ve gotta take responsibility for the things we can control if we wanna see real change. So use this affirmation to encourage yourself in building better habits.
How: Ask yourself, what habits would you need to develop more you to feel more proud of yourself?
Example: Personally, I can be super lazy. Which means I don’t exercise or do some of the other things I know I need to do, in order to hit my goals. So an example of one of my affirmations is this:
I am disciplined. Every day I commit to taking actions that change my life. And I don’t make excuses for myself. I’m taking the actions today, that will create a brighter tomorrow for me.
Affirmations about your ability and power
Why: If you’ve spent a lot of time thinking about what you can’t do it, then it’s time to do some reprograming. Self esteem affirmations focused on your ability and power can help you take the mental limits off yourself. And at that point, baby girl you can accomplish anything…
How: Ask yourself this question, “if you were to reverse all the negative things you’ve spoken over your potential, what would you say?”
Example: I’ve always been very timid. I was afraid of being wrong and I was afraid of being rejected, so I hid a lot. I shrunk often. And for a long time that defined my identity. I didn’t think I could ever be as bold and fearless and some of the people I admired. So my affirmation looked like this:
I’m courageous. I’m bold. I am fearless. God is with me, so I can do anything. I face my challenges and tackle opportunities with bravery and strength. There’s no limit to my potential, so I’m reaching for the stars.
Affirmations about your future
Why: Your views on yourself will affect your views on what’s possible for you. Low self esteem can lead to negative self talk that discourages your from going after your dreams. Affirmations around your future can help shift your focus to what you really want and what you’re working towards.
How: Answer this, “If I could do anything in this world, and I knew I wouldn’t fail, what would I do?” (i love this question btw) Here’s one of my affirmations.
Example: Despite the fact that I’m an introvert, there’s always been a part of me that knew I wanted to impact the world. I knew I wanted to be bold and share my gifts with the world (I’m still discovering my gifts. For a long time I didn’t think I had any gifts, but throughout the years God’s started revealing them to me.)
I’m an author, speaker, and entrepreneur. I’m empowering women all around the globe to be the best versions of themselves. I show up fully and authentically in this world. I’m everything God created me to be and I’m living out my purpose to the fullest.
Self Esteem Affirmations about your relationship with yourself
Why: Outside of your relationship with God, your relationship with yourself is the most important relationship you can have. Use these Self-esteem affirmations to reframe how you see yourself and change the way you treat yourself.
How: In an ideal world, how would you feel about yourself? And how would you treat yourself? Use those answers to help you write your affirmation.
Example: Growing up, I rejected myself in many ways (and that’s probably why I was so afraid of other people rejecting me.) I didn’t like the way I looked, I hated my personality, and as a result I found it very hard to like me. So here’s where I started with my affirmation.
I’m not perfect and that’s okay. I don’t need to be perfect, I just need to try my best. And as long as I do that, I’m proud of me. I choose to be gracious and kind towards myself. I choose to forgive myself when I mess up and I choose to encourage myself to keep pushing. I’m honest about my shortcomings, but I do not put myself down. On my best days and on my worst days, I love me, I like me, and I choose me. Always.
Affirmations about your relationships with others
Why: If you don’t value yourself, chances are you’ll form relationships with (and even gravitate to) people who don’t value you either. People who will mistreat, use, and even abuse you. Besides that, your self-image can make YOU a horrible person to be in a relationship with. It can make your prone to jealousy, resentment, anger. You can end up making your happiness, someone else’s responsibility. And, that’s no bueno. Self esteem affirmations can be powerful in helping you redefine your relationships.
How: At your best, what kind of friend/partner do you want to be? How do you want people to treat you? Use those answers to help you write your self esteem affirmations.
Example: Girl, I can tell you from experience that low self esteem can land you in the wrong relationships. Trust me, I’ve been there. I had to go back to the basics in terms of what I would and wouldn’t tolerate in my relationships. #boundaries I’ve also had to be honest about the fact that my constant desire to be validated, made me a bad friend in some cases. I’d end up being jealous of friends when I should have been celebrating them. As I grew in my relationship with God, it become super important to me that I become a better friend and that I set standards in my relationships. So here’s what my affirmation looked like.
I love the people in my life fully and completely. I am not envious, I am supportive. Celebrating my friends and family brings me so much joy. I value the people in my life, and I choose relationships with people who value, respect, and love me. I won’t settle for less than I deserve and I won’t stay in relationships with people who don’t mean me well.
Affirmations about your relationship with God
Of course, we saved the best and most important for last.
Why: God didn’t make any mistakes on you and you weren’t an accident. If you rely on Him to show you who He created you to be and how He sees you, it has the power to change your whole world.
How: Imagine this, “what if you have a purpose bigger than you’ve ever imagined? What if you were given gifts, talents, and capabilities that you haven’t discovered yet? And what if the key to you living your best life was found in your relationship with God? What kind of relationship would you want to have with Him? Use that as inspiration to write your affirmations.
Example: My relationship with God was the #1 reason I’ve been able to overcome insecurity. #facts. I spent so much time HATING Him because I believed that He made everyone better than He made me. I believed He could’ve given me a better body, better personality, blah blah blah. So I resented Him. But, part of me that hoped that He saw more in me than I saw in myself. Because of that I started asking Him to help me see myself the way He sees me. I turned that prayer into one of my self esteem affirmations:
A perfect God made me. He loves me, sees me, and cares for me. He could have made anyone else, but He chose me. And I know He sees beauty in me. With each passing day, I learn to see myself the way He sees me. And through my relationship with Him, I’m discovering my own beauty, my potential, and my purpose. He loves me and I love Him.
The key to writing powerful self esteem affirmations:
In order for these affirmations to work, you’ve gotta make them personal. Make them relevant to whatever you’re dealing with. That’s why I didn’t give you pre-written affirmations, because what works for me, probably won’t work for you.
But if you start using affirmations, you will notice a difference. That leads me to today’s challenge.
Day 4 Challenge: Write your own Self Esteem Affirmations
Today’s challenge is probably pretty obvious, but here’s what you’re going to do:
- Come up with a list of the topics you want to write affirmation around (hint: what are some areas you’re struggling in)
- Use the prompts above (or create your own) to write your own affirmations
- Post your affirmations somewhere you can see it daily.
- Include your self esteem affirmations in your daily routine. (I recommend saying them in the morning after you wake up and at night before you go to bed.)